Not true!
Words are a great asset, yet they are not all we have for effective communicaion. Sometimes, as some of us can probably to attest to, words do get in the way. Some of us are so busy formulating our own response to a discussion, that we don’t really participate in the discussion. A common fault, and it has been the cause of many a break-down in collegial and familial relations.
Practising the “Art of Listening” is such a skill.
Not the fake “active” listening some professionals are trained to use. I recommend “Intentional” listening. Mindfulness can assist in practising this mode, yet once again, I have my own word for that too – I call it Attentionality. Yet like Minfulness, we sit quietly, slow down our bodily movements, notice our breath and what it is doing. Then when we decide to pay attention, we make a sincere decision to do so, like self-talk, we instruct ourselves. One of my Supervisees said Attentionality or Paying Attention was not a phrase she would ever use as it has echoes of being told in childhood to “pay attention!” It sent shivers up her spine.
TASK – For one,two, or three whole minutes – focus, and pay attention to the bee hovering over your garden flowers.
When I was in training as a Spiritual Director [Christian Tradition] we were instructed to go outside, mid-Winter, and find ‘something’ to contemplate for 20 whole minutes. I chose a culvert with water coming from the kerbside and drains nearby, down into the culvert. More next time….it was extraordinarily fascinating.
Qn – what words would you use instead of mindfulness or attentionality?